Revelations and memories…
"Yet here he was, in that ridiculously tight shirt and loose shorts that kept bunching up around his thick thighs, looking comfortable and handsome, telling me he was bi. My teenage self would have probably gone into a fit of self-isolating introspection at that news, unsure of what to do with that information.
Not that adult me was necessarily all that confident about what to do, but I wasn’t that hesitant, awkward teenager anymore. I knew a good-looking man when I saw one, and while I wasn’t set on doing anything about it, just that little change in perspective made me wonder what might come of this conversation.
“Anyway,” he said, roughly clearing his throat, and I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe he wasn’t all that comfortable with his sexuality as he tried to claim. “It started with that. Complaining he never got any free time to do it and wondering if he could do it while we were there.”
“Well, I’ve heard it’s not exactly uncommon—”
“I wouldn’t know. Most of the guys in my group were pretty…not open about that.”
“Weird, I thought you said they had no shame.”
“I just meant not open, like, they didn’t try to whip it out in front of everyone. They definitely did it, but they did it out of sight, and we all pretended we didn’t know what they were doing.”
“So this was your first time seeing a guy do it.”
“Yeahhhhh, and then you know, he noticed me staring, told me I could do it too. The in-the-closet part of me was like, ‘hell no’ because that wasn’t who I thought I was. The other part of me was like, well, it’s been weeks because I wasn’t one of those guys willing to risk getting caught.”
“Ah, so too much time not…taking care of yourself.”
“Yeah, can you believe it? That’s all it took to get the ball rolling, just a little too much time not jerking off.”
“I’m quite sure most men would agree that going for a long time without release is a solid way to increase your sex drive to…interesting levels,” I said, which, of course, led me to start doing the math as to how long it had been since I’d last dealt with my own needs. It had been…almost a month since I’d been with another person and over a week since I’d pleasured myself.
Well, that might go a long way toward explaining why Leon looked like an excellent cut of beef after telling me he was bi. And the fact that he was better looking than ever and, apparently, my feelings, on the physical side at least, hadn’t entirely faded away.
“Yeah, well, it made me let him ‘help’ me,” he said with a shrug. “Kinda freaked out, but you won’t be surprised to find out that a week later, I let it happen again.”
“So, was that it?” I asked, now invested in this tale of self-awakening. “Mutual masturbation? Or was it just him doing it for you.”
“Oh, everything up to fucking,” he said with a shrug. “I didn’t do that until after I graduated and could buy lube. And that story is going to be for another time because there is no way in hell I am going into that. I’ve made enough of an ass of myself tonight.”
I chuckled, rolling onto my back and smirking at him. “I wouldn’t say you’ve made an ass of yourself.”
“What would you say then?”
“I’d say you told an entertaining story.”
“Yeah, that doesn’t really help.”
I set both legs on either side of one of his. Leon didn’t shift away, but I noticed him glance at where our bodies lightly touched, and I chuckled. “Well, there are far worse ways to become aware of your bisexuality. I’m also sure there are plenty of men you could seduce with that story.”
“Why, because of men in uniform?”
“It is a particular soft spot for a lot of guys.”
“Nothing soft about it.”
I grinned. “True. But I am definitely going to want to hear the story of your first experience with anal somewhere down the road.”
“Ugh, I can’t wait.”
“Me either.”
He took another drink, his eyes locked on my face. “So what about you?”
“What about me?”
“Did that story do it for you? Did you enjoy a bit of friskiness between two men in uniform?”
“Can’t say I was ever the type to get hung up on something like a uniform. I can appreciate that being in the military will shape a man physically rather nicely.”
“Oh ho, into built guys, huh?”
“Mmm, into men that are bigger than me, yes. Brent should have been an indication of that.”
His lip twitched. “And you never worried about the size difference and what that might mean for you?”
“I assumed it meant a good time,” I said with a smirk. “Or at least, I hoped so. That’s not always the case.”
“I meant for your safety.”
“Ah, that. No, I never worried.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“I guess you’ve just got better at reading people then.”
“It is a handy skill to have.”
Which was part of the truth. The other part was that despite my customary role of not being in the thick of things, that didn’t mean I hadn’t been trained to take care of myself if necessary. The Collective might operate by putting specialists where they performed best, but being strictly a one-trick pony was a good way to find yourself in trouble, so I had been trained to defend myself with ruthless efficiency.
I knew I wouldn’t stand a chance against someone like Ember, who had trained her body to be like a second weapon, but it was enough to deal with your standard threat. I still practiced, keeping myself honed and capable of dealing damage if needed. I also was quite a good shot when it came down to it, but thankfully, neither skill set was needed often. I trained because you never knew when they could come in handy, but that was just part and parcel of who I was.
“I’ll be honest with you,” he said, draining his glass and setting it aside on the coffee table. “I had a little…moment earlier.”
“A moment?” I wondered, not sure where this was going.
He chuckled. “When you came out of the shower wearing nothing but that skimpy towel.”
“Skimpy…oh,” I let out a laugh. “I grabbed what I thought were appropriately sized towels, and it appears I was wrong.”
“I’m not complaining.”
And here, perhaps, was why I had been so intrigued when he brought up his awareness of his sexuality. Perhaps it wasn’t because it made it possible there was more to it than him telling me of an old crush he hadn’t been aware of at the time, but perhaps an…opportunity. Sometimes, the best way to read people was to allow your instincts, which could masquerade as impulses, to take over for you and simply see where events led.
“I’m going to hazard a guess that you enjoyed what you saw,” I said, feeling a warmth grow in my stomach at his affirming grin.
Yet he still didn’t answer right away, choosing instead to stare at me with that same pleased grin. Wondering what was going on in his head was a new experience for me, but it wasn’t unpleasant.
He tilted his head ever so slightly. “And if I did?”
I gave a soft laugh, wondering if this was his awkwardness about sex manifesting in teasing or if he was just plain enjoying tossing the ball back in my court. “Then maybe you should have said something.”
“And if I had?”
“Well, wardrobe malfunctions happen all the time.”
“Hmm, especially with towels that are precariously tied.”
“This is true.”
The smile was gone, but the intensity of his gaze had increased. Just as interesting for me, I noticed that the front of his loose shorts was not as loose as a couple of minutes before. Much to my delight, the shorts were, in fact, straining quite impressively.
“Now, isn’t that fascinating?” I asked in a soft voice, waiting until he followed my gaze down to his groin.
He chuckled. “Not generally the kind of thing you normally want to hear when someone sees your dick. But unless you’ve changed drastically over the years, that’s the equivalent of someone practically drooling.”
“Close enough,” I said with a smirk, draining my drink and setting the empty glass aside. “And quite brave of you.”
“What?” he asked with a laugh.
“And perhaps a little hypocritical.”
“Alright, is this leading somewhere good, or are you about to take me off guard with a verbal backhand?”
“Well, I just meant after you talked about my wearing a towel that was too small, here you are wearing shorts that are clearly ill-equipped to contain what they’re fighting so hard to hold back.”
“Oh,” he chuckled and shifted his position to mimic mine, on his back and legs open. Which, of course, only served to make the prominent bulge even more obvious as the shape slid along the leg of his shorts. “Well, these are comfortable.”
“The human mind is such an interesting thing,” I said, feeling my heart speed up as the outline of his cock finally made its way forward enough that I could see the barest patch of skin peeking out. I didn’t need bright lighting to know his dick was probably a quarter of an inch from slipping free.
“Why’s that?”
“Because somehow the slightest glimpse of the skin of your dick trying to make its great escape is as tantalizing as if it were on full display.”
“Ahh, so I shouldn’t do this then?” he asked, giving his leg a slight jerk, and succeeding in giving his cock just the right amount of space.
Despite people’s complete confidence in my ability to control my emotions with an iron grip, my control was not faultless. I found myself unable to look away as the head slid into view, but in no time, more came into view. It did not, in fact, simply slide into view, I quickly realized, but now it was free from what had probably been uncomfortable confines. It was growing.
“No, no, by all means,” I said in a rough voice as I realized I’d been incredibly wrong about his supposed awkwardness about sex. Clearly, that little personality quirk had been dead and buried long before we ever met again. Apparently, that was all he needed, and he pushed himself up into a sitting position with a liquid smoothness that somehow managed to work with his bulky frame. There was a brief moment where that catlike movement sent a shiver of alarm through me. Then he was moving toward me, and any possible worry disappeared, and I let myself fall back against the arm of the couch as he hovered over me.
I knew what he wanted and didn’t hesitate to reach out and wrap my fingers around the exposed shaft. A soft noise escaped my lips as I felt the heat pushing against my palm and then the slightest of twitches to show just how much he was already enjoying himself. I wasn’t surprised to find the tip was slick with his excitement.
I wanted to keep my eyes on his cock, watching the full display that was sure to come, but I found my eyes drawn to his face. His bottom lip was caught between his teeth, his eyes catching the firelight, making them burn as he slowly lowered himself toward me. There was a moment where my breath hesitated, an unknown occurrence for me, before his lips met mine, and just like the alarm from moments ago, that thought too disappeared.
Leon lowered his body, letting it press between my legs and forcing me to pull my hand away from his shaft. Instead, I shifted my grip to his hips, pushing his shirt up so I could feel his warm skin against my fingers and the way his muscles moved ever so slightly. Even as I relished the taste of him on my tongue, I felt a surge of heat rush through me as his weight slowly bore down on me.
I hadn’t been downplaying the thrill I got out of having a partner who was noticeably bigger than me, but I hadn’t sold it fairly either. Yet even the thrill I got when a bigger man lay across me was nothing compared to the feeling of Leon doing it. Whether it was old feelings that hadn’t gone away or some newfound desire I didn’t have the brainpower to analyze, the result was a high I couldn’t remember ever having felt before.
If anything, the previous wariness, or downright alarm sat at the back of my head, throwing gasoline onto the fire building in my groin. I’d always been aware that the sheer difference of strength between myself and my current partner was a thrill, though whether it was simply an adrenaline high of sorts or flirting with the classic Call of the Void, I didn’t know.
With Leon, after only a couple of minutes of feeling his tongue slide over mine, however, it was intensified. My body practically vibrated with anticipation and lust as his hand slid down my side to grip my hip or when his legs pressed against mine to widen them and allow him to rest his groin against my ass, making me shiver at the feel of his arousal pushing firmly. An eagerness I hadn’t felt in a long time filled me as I wrapped my legs around his waist to hold him in place, ‘forcing’ him to grind against me.
At some point, his shorts were yanked off in a flurry of sharp, quick movements, and I once more found my hand around him, or, more accurately, my hands. It was an impressive beast. The familiar feeling of wariness at the sheer size and the excitement that came from that fear bubbled beneath the surface. I didn’t know how far things would go between us or if there would be a repeat down the road, but if I tried to take him tonight, I would feel it for a couple of days, depending on how impatient we were.
He froze suddenly, tilting his head away from my face. “What…is that?”
“What?” I asked in confusion, but he remained silent, forcing me to shift my attention away from him. Then, I heard a shrill noise from the kitchen, one I recognized and frowned at. “That’s…my phone.”
“It’s almost two in the morning,” he said slowly."
Not that adult me was necessarily all that confident about what to do, but I wasn’t that hesitant, awkward teenager anymore. I knew a good-looking man when I saw one, and while I wasn’t set on doing anything about it, just that little change in perspective made me wonder what might come of this conversation.
“Anyway,” he said, roughly clearing his throat, and I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe he wasn’t all that comfortable with his sexuality as he tried to claim. “It started with that. Complaining he never got any free time to do it and wondering if he could do it while we were there.”
“Well, I’ve heard it’s not exactly uncommon—”
“I wouldn’t know. Most of the guys in my group were pretty…not open about that.”
“Weird, I thought you said they had no shame.”
“I just meant not open, like, they didn’t try to whip it out in front of everyone. They definitely did it, but they did it out of sight, and we all pretended we didn’t know what they were doing.”
“So this was your first time seeing a guy do it.”
“Yeahhhhh, and then you know, he noticed me staring, told me I could do it too. The in-the-closet part of me was like, ‘hell no’ because that wasn’t who I thought I was. The other part of me was like, well, it’s been weeks because I wasn’t one of those guys willing to risk getting caught.”
“Ah, so too much time not…taking care of yourself.”
“Yeah, can you believe it? That’s all it took to get the ball rolling, just a little too much time not jerking off.”
“I’m quite sure most men would agree that going for a long time without release is a solid way to increase your sex drive to…interesting levels,” I said, which, of course, led me to start doing the math as to how long it had been since I’d last dealt with my own needs. It had been…almost a month since I’d been with another person and over a week since I’d pleasured myself.
Well, that might go a long way toward explaining why Leon looked like an excellent cut of beef after telling me he was bi. And the fact that he was better looking than ever and, apparently, my feelings, on the physical side at least, hadn’t entirely faded away.
“Yeah, well, it made me let him ‘help’ me,” he said with a shrug. “Kinda freaked out, but you won’t be surprised to find out that a week later, I let it happen again.”
“So, was that it?” I asked, now invested in this tale of self-awakening. “Mutual masturbation? Or was it just him doing it for you.”
“Oh, everything up to fucking,” he said with a shrug. “I didn’t do that until after I graduated and could buy lube. And that story is going to be for another time because there is no way in hell I am going into that. I’ve made enough of an ass of myself tonight.”
I chuckled, rolling onto my back and smirking at him. “I wouldn’t say you’ve made an ass of yourself.”
“What would you say then?”
“I’d say you told an entertaining story.”
“Yeah, that doesn’t really help.”
I set both legs on either side of one of his. Leon didn’t shift away, but I noticed him glance at where our bodies lightly touched, and I chuckled. “Well, there are far worse ways to become aware of your bisexuality. I’m also sure there are plenty of men you could seduce with that story.”
“Why, because of men in uniform?”
“It is a particular soft spot for a lot of guys.”
“Nothing soft about it.”
I grinned. “True. But I am definitely going to want to hear the story of your first experience with anal somewhere down the road.”
“Ugh, I can’t wait.”
“Me either.”
He took another drink, his eyes locked on my face. “So what about you?”
“What about me?”
“Did that story do it for you? Did you enjoy a bit of friskiness between two men in uniform?”
“Can’t say I was ever the type to get hung up on something like a uniform. I can appreciate that being in the military will shape a man physically rather nicely.”
“Oh ho, into built guys, huh?”
“Mmm, into men that are bigger than me, yes. Brent should have been an indication of that.”
His lip twitched. “And you never worried about the size difference and what that might mean for you?”
“I assumed it meant a good time,” I said with a smirk. “Or at least, I hoped so. That’s not always the case.”
“I meant for your safety.”
“Ah, that. No, I never worried.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“I guess you’ve just got better at reading people then.”
“It is a handy skill to have.”
Which was part of the truth. The other part was that despite my customary role of not being in the thick of things, that didn’t mean I hadn’t been trained to take care of myself if necessary. The Collective might operate by putting specialists where they performed best, but being strictly a one-trick pony was a good way to find yourself in trouble, so I had been trained to defend myself with ruthless efficiency.
I knew I wouldn’t stand a chance against someone like Ember, who had trained her body to be like a second weapon, but it was enough to deal with your standard threat. I still practiced, keeping myself honed and capable of dealing damage if needed. I also was quite a good shot when it came down to it, but thankfully, neither skill set was needed often. I trained because you never knew when they could come in handy, but that was just part and parcel of who I was.
“I’ll be honest with you,” he said, draining his glass and setting it aside on the coffee table. “I had a little…moment earlier.”
“A moment?” I wondered, not sure where this was going.
He chuckled. “When you came out of the shower wearing nothing but that skimpy towel.”
“Skimpy…oh,” I let out a laugh. “I grabbed what I thought were appropriately sized towels, and it appears I was wrong.”
“I’m not complaining.”
And here, perhaps, was why I had been so intrigued when he brought up his awareness of his sexuality. Perhaps it wasn’t because it made it possible there was more to it than him telling me of an old crush he hadn’t been aware of at the time, but perhaps an…opportunity. Sometimes, the best way to read people was to allow your instincts, which could masquerade as impulses, to take over for you and simply see where events led.
“I’m going to hazard a guess that you enjoyed what you saw,” I said, feeling a warmth grow in my stomach at his affirming grin.
Yet he still didn’t answer right away, choosing instead to stare at me with that same pleased grin. Wondering what was going on in his head was a new experience for me, but it wasn’t unpleasant.
He tilted his head ever so slightly. “And if I did?”
I gave a soft laugh, wondering if this was his awkwardness about sex manifesting in teasing or if he was just plain enjoying tossing the ball back in my court. “Then maybe you should have said something.”
“And if I had?”
“Well, wardrobe malfunctions happen all the time.”
“Hmm, especially with towels that are precariously tied.”
“This is true.”
The smile was gone, but the intensity of his gaze had increased. Just as interesting for me, I noticed that the front of his loose shorts was not as loose as a couple of minutes before. Much to my delight, the shorts were, in fact, straining quite impressively.
“Now, isn’t that fascinating?” I asked in a soft voice, waiting until he followed my gaze down to his groin.
He chuckled. “Not generally the kind of thing you normally want to hear when someone sees your dick. But unless you’ve changed drastically over the years, that’s the equivalent of someone practically drooling.”
“Close enough,” I said with a smirk, draining my drink and setting the empty glass aside. “And quite brave of you.”
“What?” he asked with a laugh.
“And perhaps a little hypocritical.”
“Alright, is this leading somewhere good, or are you about to take me off guard with a verbal backhand?”
“Well, I just meant after you talked about my wearing a towel that was too small, here you are wearing shorts that are clearly ill-equipped to contain what they’re fighting so hard to hold back.”
“Oh,” he chuckled and shifted his position to mimic mine, on his back and legs open. Which, of course, only served to make the prominent bulge even more obvious as the shape slid along the leg of his shorts. “Well, these are comfortable.”
“The human mind is such an interesting thing,” I said, feeling my heart speed up as the outline of his cock finally made its way forward enough that I could see the barest patch of skin peeking out. I didn’t need bright lighting to know his dick was probably a quarter of an inch from slipping free.
“Why’s that?”
“Because somehow the slightest glimpse of the skin of your dick trying to make its great escape is as tantalizing as if it were on full display.”
“Ahh, so I shouldn’t do this then?” he asked, giving his leg a slight jerk, and succeeding in giving his cock just the right amount of space.
Despite people’s complete confidence in my ability to control my emotions with an iron grip, my control was not faultless. I found myself unable to look away as the head slid into view, but in no time, more came into view. It did not, in fact, simply slide into view, I quickly realized, but now it was free from what had probably been uncomfortable confines. It was growing.
“No, no, by all means,” I said in a rough voice as I realized I’d been incredibly wrong about his supposed awkwardness about sex. Clearly, that little personality quirk had been dead and buried long before we ever met again. Apparently, that was all he needed, and he pushed himself up into a sitting position with a liquid smoothness that somehow managed to work with his bulky frame. There was a brief moment where that catlike movement sent a shiver of alarm through me. Then he was moving toward me, and any possible worry disappeared, and I let myself fall back against the arm of the couch as he hovered over me.
I knew what he wanted and didn’t hesitate to reach out and wrap my fingers around the exposed shaft. A soft noise escaped my lips as I felt the heat pushing against my palm and then the slightest of twitches to show just how much he was already enjoying himself. I wasn’t surprised to find the tip was slick with his excitement.
I wanted to keep my eyes on his cock, watching the full display that was sure to come, but I found my eyes drawn to his face. His bottom lip was caught between his teeth, his eyes catching the firelight, making them burn as he slowly lowered himself toward me. There was a moment where my breath hesitated, an unknown occurrence for me, before his lips met mine, and just like the alarm from moments ago, that thought too disappeared.
Leon lowered his body, letting it press between my legs and forcing me to pull my hand away from his shaft. Instead, I shifted my grip to his hips, pushing his shirt up so I could feel his warm skin against my fingers and the way his muscles moved ever so slightly. Even as I relished the taste of him on my tongue, I felt a surge of heat rush through me as his weight slowly bore down on me.
I hadn’t been downplaying the thrill I got out of having a partner who was noticeably bigger than me, but I hadn’t sold it fairly either. Yet even the thrill I got when a bigger man lay across me was nothing compared to the feeling of Leon doing it. Whether it was old feelings that hadn’t gone away or some newfound desire I didn’t have the brainpower to analyze, the result was a high I couldn’t remember ever having felt before.
If anything, the previous wariness, or downright alarm sat at the back of my head, throwing gasoline onto the fire building in my groin. I’d always been aware that the sheer difference of strength between myself and my current partner was a thrill, though whether it was simply an adrenaline high of sorts or flirting with the classic Call of the Void, I didn’t know.
With Leon, after only a couple of minutes of feeling his tongue slide over mine, however, it was intensified. My body practically vibrated with anticipation and lust as his hand slid down my side to grip my hip or when his legs pressed against mine to widen them and allow him to rest his groin against my ass, making me shiver at the feel of his arousal pushing firmly. An eagerness I hadn’t felt in a long time filled me as I wrapped my legs around his waist to hold him in place, ‘forcing’ him to grind against me.
At some point, his shorts were yanked off in a flurry of sharp, quick movements, and I once more found my hand around him, or, more accurately, my hands. It was an impressive beast. The familiar feeling of wariness at the sheer size and the excitement that came from that fear bubbled beneath the surface. I didn’t know how far things would go between us or if there would be a repeat down the road, but if I tried to take him tonight, I would feel it for a couple of days, depending on how impatient we were.
He froze suddenly, tilting his head away from my face. “What…is that?”
“What?” I asked in confusion, but he remained silent, forcing me to shift my attention away from him. Then, I heard a shrill noise from the kitchen, one I recognized and frowned at. “That’s…my phone.”
“It’s almost two in the morning,” he said slowly."
Stay in the know
© ROMEO ALEXANDER 2023